Denny Burk asks:
What do you do when the Bible conflicts with expert sociologists? Especially when the sociologists are warning against spanking your children as a means of discipline?
Writing about a U. S. News & World Report interview with spanking “expert” Murray Straus, professor of Sociology at the University of New Hampshire.
Burk contends:
…The spirit of the age is virulently opposed to spanking of any sort and is unable to distinguish between abuse and corrective discipline.
Proverbs 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom, But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother. (NASB)
Boys, you better not be shamin’ mama.
Many might disagree with me on this, but “the rod of discipline” did mean spanking in Bible times, but I do not think the verse is saying “SPANK YOUR KIDS OR DIE”, per se. The verse is meant to show the contrast between children whose parents take the time to teach their children and those whose parents do not. Discipline is sometimes part of teaching. This can mean spanking, but not always. Unfortunately, most parents who spank out there do so in a way that teaches their children nothing. Many parents spank because it’s easier and there’s usually no explanation to the child as to why a spanking was given. This isn’t teaching and can be just as foolish as doing nothing at all. In many cases, where physical and emotional abuse is involved, the child is learning to handle conflict with violence. The sociologists out there know this, so they want to eliminate spanking altogether. This isn’t the answer, either, in my opinion. I think spanking, when done correctly, is a great teaching tool. Other methods of discipline work well for our kids, too. Since we live in a fallen world, it’s no secret that the world’s view will conflict with a Biblical view on this issue. I’ll pray that God gives you guys wisdom and discernment as you teach your children. Sorry for the huge long comment here!!
Boys, you better not be shamin’ mama.
Yeah, that’s daddy’s job.
Seriously, I have a huge problem with sociologists (or anyone else) that thinks they have all the answers for the “best way” to raise a kid–especially when they use phrases like “spirit of the age”. Every kid is different.
If nothing else, an attention getter every now and them is a good reminder that sometimes you have to pretend to be good, even if you really aren’t.
There are plenty of adults who could use a good ol’ fashion whoopin’ too.
The Bible does not mandate spanking as a form of Christian discipline.
To be honest, it doesn’t forbid it, either.
The “rod” verses modify the word, “discipline,” which is the focus of the verse. Christian parents are called to *discipline* but not necessarily *spank* their children.
I have chosen not to spank based upon what I have learned in developmental psychology courses, in books, and in my experience as the mother of eight children.
My children are disciplined and the grown ones have borne good fruit.
Discipline is, above all, relational. The verse, “Train up a child in the way he should go,” is actually, “dedicate.” which translates more smoothly. Dedicate is the Hebrew word, “Chanuk,” which is where we get the word, “Channukah” the feast of dedication of the lights.
If we dedicate our children in the way they should go, this phrase hints of a more relational situation rather than the poorly rendered, “train up,” that reminds me of training circus animals.